An employee's life in customer service and other random stories.

Smart Driver

Hi, Asshole!

I just wanted to take this moment to introduce myself! We met earlier this morning. I am that bitch that almost t-boned you and your midlife crisis car because you decided it would be a good idea to pull out in front of me even though you could clearly see me speeding at you! Remember me? Probably not. I imagine you are this big of a prick all the time. It is probably pretty hard to remember all of the people you cut off. Well, I am sorry for obviously having the right of way. It is totally my fault if I scared you even though a blind man would have known that it was a bad idea to drive into the street at that point in time. In the future could you make sure to check to make sure the road is clear before pulling out into the street? In the case of a divided highway, this means you should check both sides of the median for cars going in either direction. I know this seems complicated, but I believe in you and know you can do it. I am also sorry that you feel it is necessary to overcompensate by driving some douchy camaro. I know your life is tough having a tiny penis and all, but it will all be okay. They have drugs for that nowadays. It was super nice getting to know you. Have a great day!
 
Sincerely,
Me. 
 
P.S. You should buy some stock in viagra. Buy what you know, right?